One of the most common misconceptions about sex toys and vibrators is that they are for singles only. However, this is simply false! In fact, an overwhelming number of couples use sex toys. Furthermore, a recent survey said that women who are in a committed relationship make up the biggest demographic to own and use sex toys — as many as 78 percent. It is also reported that one-quarter of couples have used a sex toy in their lovemaking.
Clearly, sex toys aren’t just for singles — far from it! Sex aids are particularly useful in long-term and committed relationships because they can help to bring a little flair and passion back into the bedroom. Additionally, sex toys can also be particularly useful when life throws a curveball at a couple’s sex life (such as menopause, andropause, orgasmic dysfunction, or even just plain old stress!).
Another reason people shy away from sex toys is because they mistakenly believe that it signals the man isn’t “doing his job” or that the sex toys are a replacement for a man. Wrong again! It’s understandable for a man to feel a little intimidated by the appearance of a plus-size vibrator or an undulating G-spotter. After all, a vibrator is built to touch a woman in all the right places — not to mention, it never gets tired (and if it does, you can just replace the batteries).
All of that could cause a guy performance anxiety, but it’s important to understand that a vibrator could never replace the human experience of lovemaking. It is merely there to enhance the experience. A vibrator can give a woman pleasure, but it can’t give her intimacy, sensuality, excitement, or passion. Those are inherently human experiences and could never be rivaled by a buzzing, battery-operated toy.
A sex toy’s usefulness manifests in other ways: It can help decrease the pleasure gap between men and women by increasing a woman’s sexual response so that her arousal is on par with that of her partner’s. In other words, a sex toy can help her to become orgasmic, which means it will shorten the time of foreplay, and lovemaking will be more mutually satisfying. Although sex toys can help “speed up” sexual activity, they do not have to be used as orgasm accelerators. They can be used simply to increase sexual pleasure and add novelty and excitement in the boudoir.
Sex toys aren’t just for a woman’s pleasure. There are many sex aids that can help increase a man’s arousal as well, such as cock rings, sleeves, pumps, and prostate toys. So if a man feels put off by his female partner’s toys, he can always choose a favorite for himself. A male-oriented sex toy can enhance pleasure and also demonstrate that toys are not a replacement for true intimacy.
It is healthy for your relationship to search for sex toys as a couple. You can easily go online or you can even enjoy a visit to a sex shop. Look for mutually beneficial toys like vibrating cock rings, finger vibes (to use for penetration or outside stimulation on your genitals), or warming lubricant.
Many sex toys are geared toward couples, whether that includes vibrators, stimulators, edible body paint, sex pillows, or even harnesses! As you explore the world of sex toys and vibrators together, think outside the box and allow yourselves to experiment. And remember, these fun sexual accessories are not a replacement for the love and intimacy you and your partner share, but they can be a fun way for both of you to enjoy more excitement and more powerful orgasms. Talk about a win-win!