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Dr. Berman on... Better Sex
Page 2
According to tantric tradition, when a man orgasms, he loses his sexual energy (which may also explain why he rolls over and falls asleep while his partner sits there watching him).
The tantric orgasm is meant to be "lived" instead of released, thereby achieving expanded consciousness and union with your partner. It is the joining of the yin and the yang, the female and male, which creates complete fusion between two people. Tantrism teaches men to harness the energy created during sex to control the desire to climax.
And you know what this gives you. That’s right — more time.
I know the thought of telling your man to delay his orgasm is about as appealing as standing naked next to Heidi Klum, but the benefits are worthwhile for those who can master it: more intense erotic experiences; prolonged lovemaking with the possibility of multiple orgasms; feelings of connectedness — with each other, with yourself, and the universe.
Men are usually taught to maintain a slower rhythm of movement, sometimes with periods of no movement at all, and to be mindful of the desire to climax, while not giving into it. Women and men are both encouraged to suppress inhibitions and taboos and focus on sensations and feelings.
Whether or not you succeed, the essence of tantric sex is instructive for any couple. It teaches you to strip away the fears, regrets, and boundaries that hold you back from an intense and satisfying erotic connection, and pushes you to get more in touch with yourself and your partner.
So forget about the time machine — it’s time to get tantric.
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